Friends… can be amazing, but they can also be terrible. I’ve experienced both. When I first started high school I became friends with a group of girls who, at the time, I thought, were amazing. Ohhhhh how I was wrong, terribly, terrifyingly wrong. Little did I know that these group of girls would lead me into a death spiral of severe depression and self hate. It fucking sucked. I endured this for the next 4 years of my high schooling life. But overtime I realised that I needed to get out of that toxic relationship, however I never had the guts to do it. I didn’t have a backbone. I was practically a puppet. But one day, things changed. Something inside of me snapped back, something inside of me kickstarted the fighter that I am today. And I got myself out that death spiral. From then on I woke up, woke up to what was happening around me, at home and what I had been going through.
I hadn’t re-lived those memories from high school for a really long time, but they popped back into my head today when I was out with my mates. We were having such a good conversation, sipping our drinks and devouring some wedges, when I suddenly thought, this group of people that I’ve met are amazing, these are the group of people that I was supposed to meet all along. When you find that group of friends, who you just click with, who understand you, who accept you for who you are and do not judge, you should hang on to them. People come and people go. That is what happens in life. I’ve had so many people walk out of my life and very few walk in. But for those who have stayed, I am forever grateful and happy.
There are days where I think back on life in high school, and I ask myself this question: “Who would I be if things had been different?” Would I be happier? Would I be sadder?
But then again, why dwell on the past when the present is so much more satisfying.