Is how i’ve been feeling this past week. You can mask the pain and the emptiness. But at the end of the day, it comes rushing back in tenfold.
It’s a hard feeling to describe… I guess it feels like your heart isn’t there anymore, you’re numb to everything around you. And anything can trigger a deeper spiral. Sometimes you want to reach out… but most of the time you don’t. You don’t want to see the judgement on their faces, you don’t want to hear the “but you were fine yesterday, what happened?”question and you don’t want to drag someone into the spiral with you.
So you don’t.
You pull yourself together, you tell yourself that “it has been worse”, that “you are strong”, that you’re a fighter. And each time, it gets better and better and you get stronger and stronger.
I’m writing this post… My first post in over 6 months because I’ve finally found the inspiration to start writing again, granted it may be very sporadic to start off, but its a start.
I began this blog thinking that I’d post a lot about my travels, but over time I came to realise that it was repetitive and not coming from the heart (sounds really corny, I know). In all honesty, I’ve got no idea what I will be posting, it may be about my travels and tips, and it may be about my life.
Either way, I’m super excited to start writing again 🙂
P.S To those lovely people who have stuck around, you’re all amazing
A little over a year ago today, I packed my bags for a 6 week solo travel/dance experience that has forever changed me. Getting back into routine was one of the hardest things that I struggled with. What was especially tough was having to stay in the one place for a long period of time. Put simply, I didn’t deal with it well. Over Christmas I worked A LOT, saved up some cash and booked a trip to Vanuatu because I was THAT antsy to go and explore! It satisfied my wanderlust… but only for a while, 4 months later, I was off to Sydney and Brisbane to visit a couple mates. One week after I returned I had packed my bags for another short trip to the snow.
What I love about traveling is the unknown, it gives me a sense of excitement, joy and happiness. When you tell people that you have traveled the world solo, they think you’re crazy, but I think that those of us that choose to travel alone are amazing.
Just like the namesake of my blog, I truly have a gypsy soul.